This topic sparked after a conversation I had with a friend earlier, being a student feels like a very weird in between stage. I am an adult, I moved out of my parents house, I manage my own finances and look after myself. Yet sometimes it is blatantly obvious I’m not taken as seriously as I should be because I am a student. This conversation was mainly focused around estate agents as we both felt they take complete advantage of students, obviously this is a completely biased opinion, however I know it isn’t only us that feel this way.
This is my fourth year of being a university student, I’ve lived independently for all of that time yet I can’t help but still feel like people treat me like a teenager sometimes. Why does it matter that I’m in full time education compared to a full time job? Majority of people I know at university also work part time, and although they have student finance, they support themselves financially as much as possible. I know this opinion doesn’t apply to everyone, and lots of people don’t view university students differently to adults but there is definitely a stigma around them.
It also doesn’t just apply to what people think of us, I know other people have felt similarly to me, these past few years have been a continuous cycle of freaking out about my life plan and working out what job would be suited to me. It’s a time that people constantly tell you to enjoy, and I’m sure when I am older I will look back and miss this time, however it also feels like a very important, scary time where I have to make so many decisions when I barely know what I want for dinner. Maybe that’s why people hold a stigma around students, it really comes down to jealousy of missing that time of their life.
This whole period has been a confusing time of working out what I’m doing with my life, and the more I muddle through it, I notice everyone feels the same and you just have to not think to much about it.
See you next time pals x
On my CFS/ME course they use the term setbacks to talk about anything that creates struggles for us when managing our illness. To a certain extent, the past month’s events have been a huge setback in my illness, I have become significantly more poorly, but it has been really hard judging when to let myself feel sad and grieve, or when it is impacting my illness and making me feel worse.
In my previous post I spoke about positivity and how important it is to remain optimistic with this illness, it serves no value to feel sorry for myself. What I’m really struggling with at the moment is remembering that in the past year I’ve lost two people very close to me, anyone without an illness would be struggling to and I have to be kind to myself because I have to manage an illness and manage bereavement.
My plan for the next few weeks is to put myself first as much as possible and put my illness back at the top of my priorities. It’s okay to be a bit selfish in these circumstances. If someone I knew was in my position, I’d be telling them to put themselves first, so I should take my own advice.
See you next time pals x
It’s been a hot minute since I wrote a blog post as I sadly lost my Grandma at the end of October, so needed some time to process and recoup. I don’t want this to seem selfish but obviously this has taken a huge toll on my fatigue, it doesn’t take a medical professional to connect stress to illnesses, I have seen a huge decline in my health the past few weeks. On the other hand, I think it’s important to remember that there is a reason for that, I’d come so far with managing my fatigue and was actually going through a very healthy patch, there’s no reason I can’t go back to that.
One of the biggest things I’ve learnt with CFS/ME is how vital your mindset is, now I’m not saying I never have days where I don’t feel down about being ill, I just know how important it is to keep positive. I count myself lucky that I am able to keep motivated to get as well as I can, it would be so easy to just settle and believe that I’m always going to be this ill. It took me a long time to get to this place, a huge part of it was accepting that I am chronically ill.
I pride myself in being optimistic, particularly as someone who has suffered with depression for years, it’s never prevented me from being hopeful for better. I will put my hands up and say I am guilty of getting easily frustrated when people are pessimistic, I’ve just never seen a need for it. I understand being realistic however there’s a difference between the two, it must be so draining to constantly think negatively. Maybe it’s because I have spent years teaching myself to separate the negative thoughts that come with depression, so therefore don’t understand why someone would voluntarily always take the cynical side of things.
I hope this post will help some people that find themselves stuck in negative thoughts, even I find it draining when someone is constantly moaning so goodness knows how they feel. It’s okay to be sad and to moan but you have to be able to pick yourself up and focus on what is really going to help you. A little positivity can go a long way.
See you next time pals x